Like I said, I’ve had a lot of extra work to do these past few days, and while I’ve been working I’ve been listening to Star Wars audiobooks. I started around the Old Republic stories, and yesterday was listening to “A New Hope” when I reached the part where Luke Skywalker turns on his father’s lightsaber for the first time.
In the story, they describe it as not being hot, which seems rather unlikely to me, since those things sure do look pretty hot. Then again, although I have read how lightsabers are supposed to work, I know nothing about the actual, real-world physics of how lightsabers would work, if they existed. So I can’t really say for sure if lightsabers would be hot or not.
Still, if I had to guess, I’d go for saying they’re hot. And thinking about this, and burning, and lamps, and fake lightsabers and all those things, I somehow thought of lightsabers and tannings beds. And that thought go me thinking that for some reason, most dark Jedi, Sith and such are very pale (Darth Maul doesn’t really count, since that’s just the color of his skin, it’s not like he’s red and black for being out in the sun too long).
So now you know, tan is light, pale is dark.
NOTE: I apologize if this joke has been done before by somebody else. The thing about making Star Wars jokes is that one always runs the risk of making jokes that have already been done. Standard Star Wars joke procedure demands that you do Google searches before you decide to go forward with it, which is why I had to discard my attacking Jabba the Hut with a saltshaker joke and that Darth Vader would dress up as Batman for Halloween. Nevertheless, you never know. Maybe it’s been done in some obscure forum or something like that. I did my search, and that’s my defense.
Just in case, y’know.